A gathering of ideas

Subject: A gathering of ideas Wed May 21, 2008 9:42 am

I don't believe I've posed this question before but wanted to ask if anyone has any ideas other than the ususal. I'm trying to get things together for the memorial gathering for my mom in June. I've the pictures, and a poem I wrote for my mom. A thank you note and request for people to write out memories they have of my mother for a future memory book. Food from the ladies in the church. Flowers, the favorite of my mom. Can't think of anything else. Any ideas or do you think this is enough. I almost do, but I can't help but think I'm missing something.

Subject: Re: A gathering of ideas Wed May 21, 2008 9:48 am

The only other thing that comes to mind is a video. Is there any video of your mother about, whole or bits, that could be made into collage?

Otherwise, I think you've covered all the bases. It sounds like it will be a lovely service Barb. When is it scheduled for?
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Subject: Re: A gathering of ideas Wed May 21, 2008 12:50 pm

It sounds perfect to me too Barbara, and very well thought out.

When we had the memorial service for my grandfather, my daughter was too little to be there at the time (in my opinion) and as she was very close to him, and with family circumstances at the time, I felt it would be too upsetting for her. She did, however, draw a lovely picture and wrote how she felt about her Poppa, which the vicar read out and showed everyone at the service. She felt very pleased that she was still a 'part' of it even in her absence. Maybe if there are any youngsters/children in your family, they might like to include drawings etc, or talk about favourite times? Just a little thought.

Subject: Re: A gathering of ideas Thu May 22, 2008 7:09 am

When we held the memorial service for my sister last year we prepared an order of service with her photo on the front and a bit of detail inside. We put an acknowledgement on the back page thanking individuals who had been kind to her throughout her illness, and any people who had helped in the preparation of the refreshments, accommodation for visiting family etc.

Our son also prepared a memorial website (no cost) to which people were given the web address so they could leave comments there. We've always intended to update it but haven't done so for a few months now.

We also had a small table at the front of the church where we displayed a few framed photos and other memorabilia from her collections etc. It was a point of recollection and amusement for the people attending and it was good for us as a family too. It helped us focus on her life. We also had family photograph albums on a table during the reception for people to browse through.

I hope all your plans are a very healing experience for you Barb. I know it is with mixed emotions you carry out such a final act to honour your mother's life. Your plans sound perfect and well thought out.

Jacquie x
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Subject: Re: A gathering of ideas Thu May 22, 2008 9:37 am

This may sound silly, but perhaps cook your mams fave food, to have as a memory, or for people to eat. And how about making a cd of your mams fave songs to play, whatever you decide to do, Im sure it will be beautiful, and your mam will be watching down from Heaven, with a smile on her face, feeling so proud of her daughter.

Subject: Re: A gathering of ideas Sun May 25, 2008 11:12 am

Good Morning all,
Was your Mum a keen cook? If so perhaps you could compile a booklet of her 'speciality' dishes. My Mum and sisters and I treasure the recipes we still call my grandmother's. We have her lemon drizzle cake regularly and it is always referred to as hers, whoever has made it. It is a very nice way to remember someone - our children have also picked this up and hopefully it will continue on through the following generations, along with the recipes!
Helen

Subject: Re: A gathering of ideas Sun May 25, 2008 11:53 am

Thanks for the variety of ideas and I have considered a few of them. Ya know the sad part of the music is I never really knew what her favorite was. She'd sing some songs, some that made us laugh but actual ones I'm not sure of.
As for recipes. I do remember some of her desserts and have considered making a few of them,for the service, still unsure as I have so much to do.
Anything I have to print out will be in blue because that was her favorite color.
That's why it would be nice if my sister would communicate with me then I could get my schedule close to what I plan on doing. If she doesn't "step up to the plate" soon I'll plan anyway.

Anyway, thanks again I appreciate how everything is so sweet and heartfelt.

Subject: Re: A gathering of ideas Mon May 26, 2008 9:45 am

You are truly welcome Barb.

Subject: Re: A gathering of ideas Mon May 26, 2008 10:52 am

Barb, I hope your sister comes through for you and feeds in some helpful ideas....even if it's to confirm the plans you have in mind. It is an unsettling experience to feel alone with it all and I am pleased the suggestions from Brocante ladies have been a help to you.

Jacquie x
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Subject: Re: A gathering of ideas Mon May 26, 2008 8:27 pm

One of my favorite parts of my aunt's funeral last year was that those in her family stood up and told funny stories about her. My aunt was a funny person, always telling jokes, etc. The sharing of her jokes and funny moments about her in our memories, helped to make the time lighthearted a little during a time of grief.

In her casket, there was a stuffed, giggling smiley face next to her - because she collected smiley faces and was always giggling. You wouldn't think a funeral would be funny, but more people were laughing than crying a her memorial. Just the way she would have wanted it.

Subject: Re: A gathering of ideas Mon May 26, 2008 11:43 pm

Karla..sounds wonderful..and that's the way it should be...........