Frustrated!

Subject: Frustrated! Sat Apr 12, 2008 3:49 pm

I have my niece over for the weekend because its her mom and step dads first anniversary and they decided to go away for the night. Anyway, my niece stays here all the time - I usually have her overnight for at least two nights in the month and my best friend (no, she isnt my sister but I call her daughter my "niece" anyway) has my daughter overnight the other two weekends.

So, my niece is seven and she has not stopped crying ALL weekend. She arrived yesterday morning. I have told her, nicely, several times that sometimes grown ups need to go away and have time alone together and that sometimes there are things that grown ups need to do on their own but she is still crying. I get it that she is sad but my goodness child, you are SEVEN. Enough already!

To make matters worse, my sweet friend, being worried about her, keeps calling and then she starts crying all over again. She needs to just put her foot down and tell her that enough is enough - that mommies need their time away once in awhile and that not everything is something that you do with a child. The next time that she calls, I am not going to let her speak to her daughter because it just triggers her crying.

I feel so mean for saying this but I am going to do it anyway - child, the whole world, despite what your mother has led you to believe, does NOT revolve around you! I really wish that parents would remember to teach their children that they are not the center of the universe and that sometimes, mommies need to go away and do things that they can't do too!

ARGH!!!

Subject: Re: Frustrated! Sat Apr 12, 2008 6:33 pm

I would have expected your niece to be well accustomed to staying overnight at your home so to me it does sound as if she's playing up for the cameras, so to speak!

I would ask the mom not to call your home any more....it shouldn't be that you have to field the calls so your niece feels you are the baddy in this. It's mom that needs educating and learning now to release....right now your niece is getting very mixed messages about "mom/child detachment." I hope by the time you read this your niece is calmer and you are able to distract her with some project or other...and maybe some reassuring cuddles too.

Roll on coming home time for mommy, eh?

Jacquie x

Subject: Re: Frustrated! Sun Apr 13, 2008 3:28 pm

Hi Jacquie thank you for your kind words :)

This morning things are better - she isnt nearly as weepy and her momma didnt get a chance to talk to her last night which helped I think. She called at around 9:30 and I told her that she was sleeping *evil grin*

My best friend is a fantastic momma and I adore her to bits but she needs to remember that her baby doesnt always have to come first... that sometimes, a mommy needs to do things for herself in order to have enough to offer her darling baby!